Somewhere along the line, either the Scottish tourist industry or Israeli geography teachers have failed, big time. That’s got to be the explanation for intelligent, educated Israelis repeatedly – I’ll say that again – repeatedly – confusing Scotland with Ireland.

Some recent personal conversations illustrate the phenomena:

Sabra: “You’re from Ireland, aren’t you?”

Me: “No, I bloody well am not.”

Hey, I was restrained.

Or this:

Sabra: “Glasgow. That’s in Ireland, isn’t it?”

Me: “No…”

I’ve edited out the swear words.

Or this cracker:

Sabra: “I have a friend who is booking to go on holiday later this year to Ireland. I told him to speak to you so you could tell him where to go.”

I’ll tell him where to go, alright.

Bloody hell. I know from other Scottish olim that mine is not a unique torture experience. Bizarre. Maybe that’s why we were sent to Israel – to top up the well of knowledge about the world. And especially about Scotland…